I'll SHOYU ramen. Wait...what?

Listen.  It's dreary outside.  And few things give one comfort like a giant bowl of noodle soup to slurp.  That's right slurp.  Not politely sip from an appropriately sized spoon.
I mean full on bowl-to-face action.

This shot, is of course from one of the best movies of all time, Tampopo, the 1985 classic, and the first ever "ramen western" (a hilarious take on the American spaghetti western).  It is sexy and funny and smart and if it doesn't make you crave noodles while watching it, there is probably something wrong with you. 

Also, re-watching it, I realize that in 50 years, I will become the old lady in this clip:

And in fact, if I'm being honest with myself, this actually just me, on a Tuesday at Mariano's.

Anyway.

A main plot point features one woman's quest to make the perfect ramen from scratch.  That is not what I did today. But I did make pretty good ramen that would suffice.

Recipe #13: Shoyu Chicken Ramen

So. I cheated.  I didn't make my own stock, because frankly I was too hungry to wait for all that. I completely agree with all of the people who say it is worth it to develop the flavors for hours or even a day, and I will definitely make this again doing that. But, um. Hangry.

In case you needed a reminder of what shredded chicken looked like.

 I know. Blurry.  What are you even looking at?  Well, at this point, it is chicken broth that has been boiling with ginger, sweet onion, garlic, soy sauce, chicken and arugula. Oh, and yes.  Store bought ramen noodles.  I know, I know, I should make my own. NEXT TIME, I PROMISE!

Considering I made it all in 40 minutes and was ready to slurp right away, I am a happy camper.  But in case you needed help eating ramen properly, here are a few pointers...

stolen and heavily adapted from pepper.ph

4 cups chicken broth

1 sweet onion, diced

4 cloves garlic, minced

4 inches ginger, minced

2 tbsp soy sauce

1 chicken breast fillet

3 servings dry noodles

1 package arugula

2 soft boiled eggs

Salt, to taste

Chopped spring onions, for garnish

Sesame seeds, for garnish

In a soup pot, boil the broth, onion, garlic, ginger and soy sauce

Wait for it to boil, and then add the chicken breast fillet.

Cook the chicken breast for 5-7 minutes. Remove from the broth and shred.

Add the shredded chicken back to the pot.

Cook the noodles in the same pot as directed in the package.

Check the flavor and season with salt and pepper, according to preference.

Add the arugula 30 seconds before noodles are cooked.

Serve in individual ramen bowls and garnish with half an egg, spring onions, and sesame seeds.

Winning at Tech III: Back in the Habit

"Where has she gone?" the three people who read my blog have been asking.  My dear devoted friends, fear not.  I've just been in rehearsals for a play.  And since it is a new work that is still being developed as I hurriedly type this, it has been consuming my time and thoughts.  But as tech week has rolled around, I thought it best to be inspired by past successes (see parts one and two from last year) and try to prepare for it with the tenacity of a younger Whoopi Goldberg,

You're welcome.

As always I try to be cost efficient and health conscious (at least to start with) even though in the end, we all know I'm going to go home and drink a hot toddy and eat dark chocolate when I get home at 12:45am. But here's my attempt this time, using mason jars from the Crafty Beaver...

Recipes #10, 11 and 12: Layered Taco Mason Jar, Pesto Chicken Antipasto Mason Jar, 

and Mediterranean Medley Mason Jar

Choice of libation: Double shot of espresso.  This week I am made of caffeine.

Choice of music: Running lines under my breath.  Seriously.  Can't stop, won't stop.

This entire process took me 45 minutes for all 3 recipes and I ended up with 12 jars of food. Ridiculous.  As soon as I got home from the store, I threw the chicken tenders in to marinate in the pesto. You can use store bought.  But I also have a great recipe I like to use for walnut sage pesto. Let that soak in for about 45 minutes. Then toss the chicken in the skillet until cooked through.

While the chicken's soaking, I browned some lean turkey meat with cumin, chipotle chili powder, paprika, salt and pepper, but you can also just dump in some taco seasoning.

Then you just build your jars!  From the bottom up, this one was 

salsa, diced tomatoes, red onions, avocado, ground meat, spinach and scallions.

From the bottom up, this is lemon basil vinaigrette, diced cucumber, diced tomatoes, red onions, pesto chicken, artichokes, feta, spinach and scallions. 

From the bottom up, this jar has extra virgin olive oil, tomatoes, red onions, red peppers, skim mozzarella, pesto chicken, pepperoni, spinach and scallions.

And voila!  A week's worth of healthy-ish meals!  There's enough variety in here that you won't get tired of them and the longer they soak in their "dressings", the better everything tastes anyway! GOOD JOB ON WINNING AT TECH WEEK!

(Remember: If you wanna be somebody

if you wanna go somewhere

you better wake up and make all of your week's dinners in one day so that you don't blow all your cash on Lunchables from Seven Eleven)

stolen and adapted from lexiscleankitchen.com 

Each of these make about 4 jars of food

for the taco jar:

homemade or store bought salsa

2 diced tomatoes

1/2 red onion

(I skipped the plantains, but go for it if you're feeling it)

taco seasoning (or your own spice mix)

ground meat (I did lean turkey)

spinach

scallions

for the antipasto jar:

diced pesto chicken

roasted red peppers

2 tomatoes diced

1/2 red onion

pepperoni

skim mozzarella cheese

spinach 

scallions

for the Mediterranean jar:

"loaded turkey meatballs" (except I cheated and just added more pesto chicken)

lemon basil vinaigrette 

1 diced cucumber

1 diced tomato

1/2 red onion

1 jar marinated artichokes

feta cheese

spinach 

scallions

Cook the meat.  Add seasoning.

Chop the veggies.

Layer to your heart's content.

Emjoy Cristina Barcelona

Okay I'll be honest.  This wasn't really inspired by a meal in a movie, like I promised at the beginning of the month.  We mainly wanted to make tapas and I wanted to justify writing about it on this blog.  So I thought...Hmm...what movie might have had tapas in it? Or people cooking Spanish food? Or, uhm, people in Spain? Then I had it! VICKY CRISTINA BARCELONA! PERFECT.  Except for my irrational dislike of Scarlett Johanssen.  But whatever.

Here is a picture of beautiful people eating in a Spanish kitchen.  I think. I actually don't remember the plot of this movie.  I remember loving Javier Bardem. And not loving Scarlett Johanssen.  And wanting more of Rebecca Hall (not pictured). And hoping Penelope Cruz would win.  Was it about racing?  I don't know.  Oh well.  Woody Allen directed it so it was probably about neurotics and sex.

Recipes #6, 7, 8 and 9: Octopus in Spicy Paprika Sauce, Fried Goat Cheese, Onion Confit, Saffron Meatballs

Choice of libation: Telmo Rodriguez Rueda Basa

...or what I like to call my new favorite white wine.  Lovely nose of subtle fruit and dry enough to go with our flavorful meal.  Nice citrus undertones. 

Choice of music: Just.  Yassssssssssss. This guy is a motown throwback in the best way possible.  Neo-soul former Cee-Lo backup singer Curtis Harding will MELT you.  Listen to his album, Soul Power.

This one is one of my favorite tracks, "Keep on Shining." It is good for the soul.

I know.  I know.  It looks like someone beat this little guy up.  And that's kinda true.  The instructions told us to "tenderize the octopus by throwing it forcefully about ten times into your kitchen sink."

After boiling it in a pot with lots of good spices like bay leaf and peppercorns and parsley and simmering it for what felt like forever (DON'T THROW OUT THE COOKING LIQUID! YOU'LL NEED IT LATER!), we cut the octpus into 1 inch pieces. Yes.  I sneaked a taste before the next step.  Yes. I could have eaten more. 

Garlic, salt, paprika, chili pepper, reserved cooking liquid and octopus just chilling for a few...

I would eat this every day.  I seriously would.  A little spicy, a little salty, perfect texture -- make sure not to over cook so it doesn't get too chewy.

I guess you didn't really need pictures of making the onion confit.  because while yummy, it's still just cooking a bunch of onions in oil and spices. 

 Instead, here are very exciting pictures of egg wash, parsley and dipping goat cheese in panko crumbs.

Yeah, I know.  They look boring and bland.  Much like an actress I irrationally dislike.

THIS IS TOTALLY HEALTHY SOMEHOW.

A little goes a long way, dude.  Garlic, parseley, saffron, salt.  I do wish we had done this in a mortar because this food processor is so hard to clean and annoying.  

Much like an actress I irrationally dislike.

Chad mainly worked on this part, rolling together veal, pork, garlic, egg, bread and spices.  We used just a touch of the wine that we had been guzzling earlier.  

In the end a lovely meal.  Recipes not included in this blog were the pickled watermelon and cucumber (we haven't quite perfected that recipe, but once we do we'll share it), brussel sprouts, and chopped up olives mixed with goat cheese and walnuts.  Also I have no idea what red wine that was. I think it came from a box.  But doesn't it look nice in that decanter? 

Unlike a certain actress I irrationally dislike.  

Ugh.  Look at her, riding that dolphin, like she owns the ocean.

stolen and adapted from Tapas:Little Dishes of Spain by Penelope Casas

Octopus in Spicy Paprika Sauce

1 lb small octopus

Cooking Liquid:
12 cups water
2 tblsp oil
1 bay leaf
1/2 onion peeled
4 peppercorns
2 springs parsley
sea salt

4 tsp olive oil
sea salt
paprika

Tenderize the octopus by throwing it forcefully about ten times into your sink.
Combine cooking liquid, combine water with oil, bay leaf, onion, peppercorns, parsley and salt in a large pot.
Bring to boil.
Dip the octopus in and out of the liquid 3 times quickly and return it to the liquid
Simmer for about 1 hour
Turn off heat and leave octopus in liquid until ready to use.
Cut octopus into 1 inch pieces.
Heat oil in a skillet and add the octopus, garlic and salt.
Cook for 1 minute, spriknle with paprika and chile pepper and stir in the reserved cooking liquid.  Simmer for a few more minutes.  (DO NOT OVERCOOK)

Onion Confit
2 tbsp olive oil
2 large sweet onions
2 cloves garlic minced
1/8 teaspoon crumbled thread saffron
1 bay leaf
sea salt
freshly ground pepper
1 tbsp white wine

Put the oil, onions, garlic, saffron and bay leaf in a shallow saute pan.
Heat over the lowest possible heat until the mixture begins to sizzle.
Cover and cook 40 minutes.
Season well with salt and pepper
Add white wine and cook until evaporated.

Fried Goat Cheese
1/2 recipe onion confit (I used all of it)
1 egg
1/4 tsp parsley
4 oz log goat cheese cut in 1/2 in slices
panko bread crumbs
olive oil for frying

In a shallow bowl, beat the egg and parsley together with a fork.
Dip the cheese in the egg then coat with crumbs.

Heat the oil, preferably in a deep fryer.  We did in our wok.  So it's like FUSION.
Pour oil to a depth of at least 1 inch and heat oil until it quickly browns a cube of bread
Fry cheese until golden brown and drain on paper towels.
Place fried cheese on top of confit.  Because YEAH.

Tiny Meatballs in Saffron Sauce
1/2 lb ground veal
1/2 lb ground pork
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 tbsp minced parsley
1 egg, lightly beaten
1 slice bread, crusts removed, soaked in milk, squeezed dry
1 1/2 teaspoons coarse salt
ground pepper
flour for dusting
2 tbsp olive oil
2 tblsp minced onion
1/4 tsp sweet smoked paprika
1/2 cup veal or chicken broth
2 tbsp white wine
several strands saffron
minced parsley for garnish

In a bowl mix together the veal, pork, half of the garlic, 1 tbsp of parsley, egg, bread, salt and pepper. Form into small balls not larger than 1 inch.  Dust with flour.

Heat the oil in a shallow casserole.  Brown the meatballs well on all sides.  Add the onion and saute until wilted.  Sprinkle in paprika and cook\ for one minute.  Stir in broth and wine, bring to boil, cover, and simmer for 40 minutes

Mash together in a processor or mortar the remaining garlic, parsley, saffron and a little salt.  Stir this mixture into the meatballs, sprinkle with parsley and serve. Add the saffron mixture just before serving.

"To Bridget, who cannot cook, but who we love…just as she is."

It's awards season, you guys! So in honor of that, I'm making food inspired by movies.  Because the best thing about winter is eating comfort food and putting that Netflix streaming to good use.  First up is the critically acclaimed* film, Bridget Jones' Diary.  I'm sure you remember that horrendous birthday feast she cooks for close friends because she has a "sneaking suspicion [she] is also somewhat a genius in the kitchen." Yeah. I have it slightly memorized.  We didn't have Netflix back then and I only had 3 VHS tapes. YEAH. I HAD VHS TAPES. DEAL WITH IT. 

The menu consisted of "blue soup to start, orange pudding to end and for the main course, congealed green gunge." And an omelette that dreamy Mr. Darcy makes on the fly.  

*as reviewed by college senior, me, post-break up

The potato leek soup is blue, of course, because our heroine used blue string to tie the leeks that she used in her broth.  I chose not to replicate exactly what she made in the movie because that color shouldn't occur anywhere, not even on Katy Perry.  I made a slight variation instead, where it is a slightly more appetizing green colour.  But first.  Can we talk about how Bridget Jones is friends with Dr. Gaius Baltar,  Angela Moon and Moaning Myrtle?

 If you had to be at an awful birthday dinner, these are probably the best people to drink with.

Recipe #5: Potato Leek Soup (with kale and bacon)

Choice of libation and music: I was at least accurate for this part...

(any of her albums, really, though for this evening it was "Classikhan")

(and any vodka, really, though for this evening it was whatever we had in the freezer that I've already forgotten the name of)

This story begins as so many of mine do...

Between this stuff and the bacon, at this point, the aromas from your stove will have you drooling!

 I didn't used to like Worcestershire sauce. For the life of me I can't remember why.  

Oh, immersion blender.  What would my winters be without you?

While I simmered the soup, I might have finished off the vodka in the freezer.

I would recommend adding a crap ton more sour cream and herbs and spice than the recipe calls for. The crumbled bacon at the end does help.  So I'm gonna level with you.  This wasn't AWESOME. It was fine.  And I'll eat it throughout the week because it's too cold to go out.  And sometimes "eating the entire contents of one's fridge seems inevitable."

stolen and adapted from foodnetwork.com

3 slices bacon

1 3/4 pounds Yukon gold potatoes (about 3), peeled and diced

1 leek (white and light green parts only), halved lengthwise and thinly sliced (I would do 2 leeks)

2 cloves garlic, minced (I would suggest doing at least 4 cloves)

1 teaspoon chopped fresh rosemary and/or thyme (I added 3 more teaspoons of both)

Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper (be very generous here)

4 cups low-sodium chicken broth

1 medium bunch kale, stems removed, leaves chopped (about 10 cups)

1/4 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce (I ended up adding 3 more teaspoons)

1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil

1 tablespoon sour cream (I added 3 more tablespoons)

2 tablespoons chopped smoked almonds

Cook the bacon in a large Dutch oven or pot over medium-high heat, stirring occasionally, until crisp, about 5 minutes. Remove with a slotted spoon and drain on paper towels.

Add the potatoes and leek to the drippings in the pot and cook, stirring, until the leek is slightly softened, about 3 minutes. Add the garlic, herbs, 1/4 teaspoon salt and a few grinds of pepper. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the vegetables are slightly browned, about 2 minutes. Add the chicken broth and 4 cups water and bring to a simmer; cover and cook 15 minutes. Add about three-quarters of the kale; continue cooking, covered, until wilted, about 5 minutes. Stir in the Worcestershire sauce.

Meanwhile, preheat the broiler. Toss the remaining kale with the olive oil on a baking sheet; season with salt and pepper. Broil until crisp, about 3 minutes.

Thin the sour cream with a splash of water. Working in 3 to 4 batches, puree the soup in a blender until smooth; reheat if needed. Serve topped with the sour cream, kale chips, bacon and almonds.

Still making paleo recipes. Or don't you CARROT all?

Dude. I know.  My subject titles are getting pretty bad.  In my defense, I've eaten far less cheese this month. So. 

Luckily, this concludes the month of paleo I begrudgingly completed for this blog.  It wasn't terrible but I don't know that it's something I would LIKE to do every day all the time.  I had been craving soup lately and since my previous recipes have been kind of meat heavy I thought I'd try something that vegetarians might be able to snack on.  And all this cold weather prompted me to look for something with a little heat. This time in the form of curry and ginger and cumin. 

Recipe #4: Curried Carrot Ginger Soup

Choice of libation: The 2013 reserve syrah from a niche winery in Sonoma county that happens to be called "Dawson Creek."  

  

Despite implications of the name, I didn't spew pretentious words and cry in my room to Paula Cole after drinking it.  It was actually wonderfully bold (much more Pacey than Dawson, I'd say), with notes of currant and blackberry.  The spiciness and fruit went really nice with the soup. (And the steak we had with the soup)

Choice of music: Uptown Special, produced by Mark Ronson. Of course you've probably heard "Uptown Funk" with Bruno Mars, which is a standalone hit.  But whole album is really worth listening -- in order if you can.  

I like this one and have always loved Mystikal.  Incidentally, I heard a censored version of one his more popular songs featuring the lyrics "shake ya face, but watch yourself..."  

I giggled for probably two minutes at the CVS.

Ginger and sweet onions...the beginning of many beautiful stories.

No need to justify anything for this recipe.  This IS practically a salad.

Okay, so don't do what I did and over blend it if you enjoy a thicker soup (which I do). I do like how powerful I feel when operating an immersion blender.  

I'm pretty sure that's normal and I don't need to talk to anyone about that.

 

These are pictures that other people took of the meal we ended up with.  Because Chad seared the sirloin, I didn't post the recipe.  I just figured this soup would make a better lunch or dinner side.  Which was a good call. Just know that actually this soup pairs really beautifully with a steak salad with balsamic dressing, roasted pecans, red onions and spinach.  No pictures exist because I was ACTUALLY EXPERIENCING LIFE AND NOT TAKING PICTURES OF IT. 

Also I might have just been too hangry to remember.  

stolen and heavily adapted from paleoleap.com

8 carrots, peeled and roughly chopped
2 small zucchini, peeled and roughly chopped
1 small onion, diced
1 apple, peeled and roughly chopped
(I added one small sweet potato, peeled and chopped)
2 tbsp. fresh ginger, minced;
1 tsp. turmeric; (we didn't have tumeric, but I added 3 tbsp curry, 2 tbsp cumin and 1 tbsp chipotle chile powder)
Pinch of cinnamon;
4 cups chicken or vegetable stock;
1 cup coconut milk; (optional)
Cooking fat
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper;

Melt some cooking fat in a saucepan placed over a medium-high heat.
Add the ginger and the onion and cook until fragrant, about 4 minutes.
Add all the remaining vegetables, the apple, and the spices. Give everything a good stir, and cook until the carrots are soft.
Pour in the stock and bring to a boil, lower the heat and let everything simmer for 25 to 30 minutes.
Puree the soup using an immersion blender, or in batches using a blender.
Pour in the coconut milk, season to taste, and serve warm.

Catch a Tori: A New Series on ABC Family (also, what I ate for dinner last night)

I know, I know.  Another Tori Spelling inspired food blog entry.  I'm such a cliche.

I actually chose to make chicken cacciatore because for the most part it is already a paleo recipe as long as you don't serve it atop noodles or rice.  WHICH WOULD BE DELICIOUS.  But not paleo.

Ugh. I will be so happy when this stupid paleo month is over. What was I thinking?!

The Tori Spelling reference is just a happy accident.  My playwright friend, Brooke Allen and I sometimes pass the time by texting each other shows we think Tori Spelling might want to pitch to different networks.  I mean, she's already had some gems with True Tori, So NoTorious and Tori & Dean: sTORIbook Weddings.  But why stop there?  For example -- "Tori Tori Hallelujah" - Tori becomes a minster, "Building a MysTORI" - Tori and Dean buy an old resort and turn it into a murder mystery dinner theater, or "TORIst Attraction" - Tori Amos and Tori Spelling go on a tour as a girl band, but will they? or won't they? The chemistry is palpable!

But my latest submission for our ongoing list is more kid friendly.  "Catch a Tori"  -- a baseball, voiced by Tori Spelling who accidentally gets tossed out of a little league game into the limousine of a millionaire and travels all around the world, meeting other sports equipment! Come on, you know you'd totally watch five minutes of that show. 

Recipe #3: Chicken Cacciatore

Choice of libation: A virgin daiquiri (in honor of Donna's virgin status for the first 12 seasons of Beverly Hills 90210). It was paleo, because basically it was just frozen fruit blended with ice. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. 

Choice of music:  I actually forgot to play music while cooking this one, since it didn't take very long. But.  I'll just leave this here...

So.  There's that.

I love how little there is to do for this recipe.  The first step is to microwave most of the ingredients.

Then dump all the other ingredients in the slow cooker.

Then dump the microwaved stuff in with the slow cooker stuff

(and by the way, everything smells ridiculously good at this point)...

And you mustn't forget the antioxidants...

 I had errands to run. And by "errands" I mean "TV shows" 

and by "run" I mean "watch and fall asleep to."

A relaxing seven hours later, and this awesome bowl of food happened.  The broth was incredibly complex - I could taste the blackberry notes of the malbec underneath the umami of the mushrooms and acidity of tomatoes and peppers.  I will totally make this again. 

And when I do, it won't be uncharted terriTORI.

Stolen and adapted from nomnompaleo.com

2 onions, minced in my food processor

1/4 cup tomato paste (I like the stuff that comes in a tube)

2 tablespoons of butter

6 garlic cloves, minced

2 teaspoons of dried oregano

2 red peppers chopped

1/2 ounce dried porcini mushrooms

1/4 teaspoon red pepper flakes

1.5 pounds cremini mushrooms, trimmed and halved if small or quartered if large

1 (14.5-ounce) can diced tomatoes, drained

1/2 cup organic chicken broth

1/2 cup dry red wine (I used Bodega Elena de Mendoza malbec)

3 pounds of chicken (I used drumsticks and breast tenders because Chad refuses to eat chicken thighs)

1/4 chopped fresh basil

Dump the onions, tomato paste, butter, garlic, oregano, wild mushrooms, and red pepper flakes in a microwave safe bowl. Nuke everything on high for ~5 minutes, stirring occassionally, until the onions were softened.

Put the cooked aromatics in the slow cooker and stir in the cremini, tomatoes, broth, and wine. 

Seasoned the chicken with salt and pepper and nestle them into the slow cooker and mix everything well. 

Put on the lid and cook the dish for 4-7 hours.